I don't really know what I was expecting, I mean this is part of why we get a lot of the loans and stuff. I'm not entirely sure if I should just get up tomorrow morning and go to Waterstones and get it or if I should look to see if I can get it cheaper on Amazon or something.
I may just buy them.
The lecture we had today about everything in the first year course was very daunting.
We have to read something and fill out a sheet before our first seminar and then we have to complete web based assessments before seminars and after lab sessions or something. I don't know, I'll check the handbook. When we got to our break an hour in and I went home to get a drink and a snack; I almost cried on my way out.
I had a similar problem yesterday when I was reading through the handbook. I was just looking at the rules on word counts and deadlines and research participation and instantly found myself freaking out. Obviously uni is going to be very hard work - I knew that when I signed up - I just didn't know that everything would be so strict and so difficult to get my head around.
One girl in the flat upstairs has dropped out already.
Now, don't panic (mum in particular); I'm not going to drop out. I am enjoying myself - even if I don't have the party girl attitude that most people seem to have in freshers' week. I've only consumed about 8 units of alcohol since I started on Sunday and haven't gone out with the rest of my flat (and Ollie from next door who practically lives in our kitchen) tonight. I get on really well with my flatmates, our freshers reps have exactly the right balance of partying and looking after us and every Fyldean I've met so far has been lovely. It's all just still a little scary.
I don't care if I sound boring, but I'm actually sort of looking forward to lectures starting on Monday. Yes, I'm dreading having to pay for books tomorrow and I'm almost constantly terrified that I have forgotten or will forget to do something - but once things start I can stop looking at the big picture and start to take it one day at a time. Seems much easier that way.
Side note - Alex Day's "The World is Mine (I Don't Know Anything)" just came on my iPod as I was writing - a song (and album) that pretty much sums up exactly how I feel right now. It's the perfect marriage of 'I can do anything, let's go for it' and 'everything is terrifying and I have no idea how do this'. Perfection once again appears in music. Listen at http://alexdaymusic.com/music/.
I also faced another realisation today. Last week I thought this would do one of two ways; I would love it and never want to come home or I would just be constantly homesick and go home at every opportunity. But it seems that a third option has surfaced. I don't want to go home, I don't miss Skem in any way; I feel freed from the hold that the negativity of my hometown had on me - and it is exhilarating! But I do miss the people that I've left behind. I miss my friends and family; Tash and mum. I don't want to go home, I want them to come here (they are doing tomorrow!)
It's not even the end of freshers' week yet and uni is exciting, scary, daunting and fun all in one bundle.
Let's get stuck in.
Cinema ticket for The Proposal which I went to see with a former best friend. It was pretty good if you're into Chick Flicks - Sandra Bullock was good in it. I highly recommend it :)
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